


You Found Me

by missMHO



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-22
Updated: 2013-03-11
Packaged: 2017-11-08 08:14:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 19,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/441103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missMHO/pseuds/missMHO
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony Stark is a rich man of American origin who decides to repose in English province. He becomes enthralled by the person of Loki Odinson, young scientist who's disregarded by his family.</p><p>|| AU inspired by Jane Austen's novels ||</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Strangers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “The younger son, I presume. I am Anthony Stark.”

The estate was truly a place of exceptional sublimity and Anthony Stark found himself in a peaceful state of mind once he arrived there. His dear cousin Jane was not exaggerating with her enthusiasm when she persuaded him to acquire the place.

For now, he was fully satisfied with the tranquillity that his new manor provided and savoured the longed-for flee from industrialized cities. Though, the amenities of living in the provinces swiftly arose. It was their third day in the Estate of Netherfield Park when the man of the Odinson house came by for a visit and an invitation for a ball that was being held next Thursday in order to celebrate his son’s return as an officer. While Tony – as only a few people were allowed to call him - himself wasn’t yet eager for crowds and dances, Jane was so excited about the invitation itself, he had to accede it. He expected it either way, he knew that his arrival – a single rich man of American origin – would not be overlooked by local society.

жжж

Notwithstanding earlier averseness about the ball, Tony found himself in quite good fettle on Thursday. Jane was looking ravishing and Tony himself felt that he was presenting himself quite well. The invitation also included his friend Steven Rogers, who had come with him from America, so he wouldn’t be surrounded by unfamiliar faces entirely. Besides, there was something suspending in the air that Tony couldn’t quite grasp and name, but nevertheless it was adding excitement to the evening.

They arrived as one of the first guests. Mr. Odinson, the man of the house, was waiting with the rest of his family to welcome every guest.

“It’s most pleasurable to meet you once more, Mr. Stark,” Mr. Odinson shook Tony’s hand. His grip was firm and steady. “This is my wife and my sons— well, one son, the younger has vanished _again.”_

“My brother does that,” the eldest son said apologetically. “I am Thor Odinson.”

“Anthony Stark. And this is my beloved cousin, Jane Foster and my friend, Captain Rogers.”

Jane bowed graciously, “I am honoured to meet you.”

“I see you are a man of army like myself,” Steven accosted Thor. The young Mr. Odinson was clad in a splendid uniform that couldn’t go missing from anyone’s attention. Thor nodded with a smile. He looked like he wanted to converse with Jane, but the upcoming visitors had obliged Tony and his companions to go along.

Steven and Jane went to acquaintance with the others of that had gathered, but Tony felt like he had enough of introducing for this evening. He started to wonder if coming was indeed a good idea. He took a seat on one of the chairs mounted in the corner. He felt a need for some alcohol – like always when he was constrained to commune with crowds.

“You have occupied my seat, sir.”

The words came unexpected and Tony almost jumped. He raised his head to look at the source of the plea. Before him was standing a young man of fair height and svelte silhouette. His raven black hair was in a swept-back fashion, the colour offsetting his pale skin and deep green eyes.

Tony stood up, his eyes unable to leave the stranger. “My apologies, Mr.--?”

“Odinson,” he said with a grimace, like introducing himself with that name was giving him a headache.

“The younger son, I presume. I am Anthony Stark.”

Young Mr. Odinson shook his hand, clearly to fulfil the courtesies, and took the seat next to the one he previously claimed. He sipped the beverage he held in his left hand. It looked like it wasn’t the first portion of alcohol he treated himself today, his eyes twinkling vaguely. Slightly confused, Tony retook his chair.

“Is that alcohol?” Tony enquired. “I’d kill for a glass.”

“I believe you will find some at the other end of the room. Though, I do not recommend the wine. But that is still to come,” he answered and his lips curved into a mischievous smile once he mentioned the wine. Still more intrigued than confused by the young Odinson, Tony went by the given directions.

When he returned, the raven-haired man was still in his place, however his glass was empty.

“You are quite into celebrating your brother’s return, aren’t you, Mr. Odinson?” Tony eyed the once full glass.

“Oh yes, _my brother’s_ return," he repeated gesticulating energetically, his voice full of sarcasm. “Let’s celebrate and throw a ball!” He suddenly composed himself. “Well, _my_ absence went almost unnoticed, as well as the return of mine,” he muttered. Their eyes met for a second - angry green ones with confused brown. “Excuse me.”

The youngest Mr. Odinson stood up and left the room. Tony felt a sudden urge to run after him, but quickly realized how ridiculous the thought was.

Steven’s voice took him unawares. “There you are! Already accompanied by alcohol.”

Tony smiled half-heartedly as his friend looked at him with disapproval.

“There are a lot of people who want to meet you, Tony.”

Tony joined him without demur, as well as without any enthusiasm.

 жжж

The evening went by with more of introducing and perfunctory conversations about nothing. Sometimes during situations like these, Tony wondered if the age he was born into was indeed adequate for him.

Before the dances were to start, the man of the house wanted to raise a special toast for his son, Thor. The toast of his best wine, which was a production of his family from Europe, the pride of the house. He opened the first bottle with celebration, round about followed by the servants and the special tipple was sloshed among the guests. It was then that Tony remembered the raven-haired Odinson who warned him about the wine. Not being entirely certain why, he decided now to trust his words and when everyone drunk the first sip, Tony remained still. 

A choir of disgusted moans filled the room.

“What happened to my wine?” cried Mr. Odinson. Servants started to collect the wine glasses hastily.

“We are terribly sorry,” said Thor, heckling the fuss. Tony didn’t listen to his explanations and apologies.

“I need some air,” he murmured to Steven and left.

The night air was refreshing and soothing. Tony decided to take a walk around the main building. He was feeling better with every step that receded him from the ball and the hum. The moon was shining brightly, so the odds were with him and he didn’t worry about breaking any limbs in the dark. It wasn't the first time he was wandering around unknown terrain, alone and aimless.

 жжж

Tony noticed him only when there were a few metres of distance between them. He was sitting on hillock that pitched towards the forest, moonlight outlining his silhouette.

“Oh, Mr. Stark, did you swear to disturb my person this evening?” The youngest Mr. Odinson took a sip from a bottle he held in his hand. He was lisping.

“When did I deserve such an accusation?”

“You are talking to me for a second time,” he listed. “You are _noticing me_ for a second time,” he said, more to himself than Tony and sighed. “Wine?” He offered, raising the bottle. “Though, I must warn you, I do not possess any glasses.”

Tony sat by his interlocutor, his gaze fixed on the bottle. “Quite so, _the wine_ , would you like to explicate this particular topic?”

The raven-haired Odinson giggled.

“So the fuss just now was about the wine?”

Tony confirmed with a nod. His companion giggled again and Tony felt a pleasant tingling along his spine.

“This bottle is good,” he assured as he raised it once more in a tempting gesture. “The only one that remained good.”

Tony decided to surrender to the moment and took a sip. Tipple was indeed very fine and Tony suddenly decided to focus on fishing out it’s flavours and neglect the thought that Odinson’s pale lips were touching the same bottleneck seconds ago.

“What did you do?”

“Vinegar mainly.”

“Well, that wasn’t the query that I wanted to put, let me correct myself. _Why_ did you do it?”

“I wanted to spoil my brother’s big day a bit,” he shrugged. “Well, the real aim were my beloved father, but in this case, it is the same.”

“Mischievous solution to your purpose. Though, a waste of good alcohol.”

 _“Mischievous_ , you say?” Odinson smiled mysteriously. “Funny choice of words.”

Tony raised his brows in a query.

“Are you familiar with Nordic mythology, Mr. Stark?”

“No, I've never had a chance.”

“You see, my family is of Scandinavian origin. That is the source of my our atypical names, the _tradition_ , though last two generations of Odinson's never visited North. My name is Loki— after the Nordic God of Mischief.”

“So, the spoiling of wine was your revenge for an odd name?” Tony grinned and Loki giggled once again.

“No. I have come to terms with that long ago and now I actually do like it.”

“It is likeable indeed. I have always hated the pompous names of our age. I think I should have been born in other times,” Tony frowned. Though the expression might had suited his last words, what really bothered his mind was inner discussion if he truly should allow a drop more of alcohol to get into his organism.

“You _are_ an inventor, Mr. Stark, it is quite obvious your mind should be of futuristic nature, ahead of the rest of us,” remarked Loki.

Tony looked at him perplexed. “You know who I am?”

“Yes, I do hold such knowledge. I’m quite sure that the majority knows you as 'rich man from America', but I did spend a reasonable amount of time in the kind of companionship that was aware of your inventions and bright mind.”

Tony couldn’t move his gaze from Loki, his person enthralling him more and more.

“What kind of companionship would that be?” he asked, honestly curious.

“I spent the last two years at the Royal Institution.”

Tony’s eyes widened in astonishment. “That’s astounding!”

“Truly?” Loki was honestly doubting the amazement of the American.

“Yes, absolutely! May I ask for anything more on your stay there?”

“Well, I was an assistant of Mr. Faraday.”

 _“The_ Faraday? My God, I did not know I have the honour of talking to a scientist of such magnitude.”

Tony might have thought for a moment that Loki actually blushed, but it had to be a play of light mixed with alcohol.

“Are you mocking me, Mr. Stark?”

“I have no such intentions, I am only perplexed why you would not believe in my sincere appreciation of spending an evening in the company of a brilliant mind, Mr. Odinson.”

Loki took a large gulp from the bottle.

“Well, my family does not think that being a scientist is anything respectful. My father is a retired general, he only values military achievement, as you can see,” he made a gesture towards the house full of people celebrating officer Thor Odinson’s return. “I had been gone for almost as long as my brother, though when I came back a week ago, I’ve started to wonder if my absence had been noted at all.” He made a pause and laughed miserably. “You see, Mr. Stark, I came back home because Mr. Faraday notified that at this stage my potential is coming to waste as merely an assistant and that I should start work of my own. But research needs funding. The Royal Institution may help me partially, but the base must be my own input. So, I came home, begging my father for the part of the family wealth that should belong to me.” He took another sip of the wine as Tony listened to him, enchanted. “But when my father heard that my stay in London was not youth’s folly and that I have no intention in joining the army or seeking a wife, well... Let me say, Mr. Stark, that I had never been my parent’s favourite, but _that_ seemed to nullify me completely. The very next day, just before my brother’s return, I was informed that all of Odinson’s inheritance is being transferred to Thor as soon as he becomes married. I am left bare, only possessing my knowledge and ambitions, but that is _nothing_ , as my dear father had proved to me. I do not even own a roof to live under, even in that issue I’m finding myself dependent on my brother’s pity.”

Tony found himself speechless. And suddenly brimful of detestation towards the man of the house of Odinson.

“It seems we have both found ourselves in wrong times, Mr. Odinson,” he said finally. “Full of prejudices and disregard towards means of development. I was surprised when you called me 'an inventor', because for most of people, I am a rich man who owes everything he has to his heritage. No one cares I had doubled my assets by my own means, and I fear I will forever live in my father’s shadow.” Without warning, Tony took the wine from Loki’s hands and drunk the rest of the bottle.

“I am fain to fund your research, Mr. Odinson.”

Loki opened his mouth, but no sound left. He continued to look at Tony, full of astonishment, disbelief and hope.

They both jumped when a third voice reached them from behind.

“There you are, Tony! I was fearing you had twisted your neck in the dark.”

“You are always so full of worries,” Tony stood up and looked at his friend Steven.

“Someone has to worry about you!” attested Captain Rogers. “Miss Foster said she was tired and wanted to leave.”

“Then we are indeed obliged to go.”

Tony looked at Loki who had also stood up and impressively managed to hold vertical position. Tony, on the other hand, was trying really hard not to stagger too much.

“That was a really enjoyable evening, Mr. Odinson. I hope to see you again soon.”

“My words exactly, Mr. Stark.”

They both bowed politely and Tony went towards the house along with Steven. His friend was narrating about the events after the wine incident, but Tony wasn’t listening. His head was buzzing with alcohol, and full of a young scientist named Loki Odinson. His person was fascinating and enthralling-- Tony wanted to take him apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I had actually started writing it. The idea popped into my head as I was rewatching BBC's "Pride and Prejudice" and it just couldn't leave me alone. I hope you will enjoy it. I will really really appreaciate any comments! <3
> 
> Big thanks for Jordyn, my lovely beta!
> 
> The title is inspired by Kelly Clarkson's song "You found me" - it suprisingly fits.  
> I think I will fit into about 5 chapters with this story. Update should appear within a week.


	2. Acquaintances

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You are going to be trouble, Mr. Stark.”

Loki woke up the next morning with a heavy head and the desire of burying himself alive. He was aware of his limits when it comes to alcohol and he had deliberately exceeded them all last evening. Deep down inside, in the parts of himself that were hidden from everyone, he wished this next day would never come. But it did. And it was even more unpleasant than he foresaw.

“My dear brother, why do you still linger in bed?” Thor’s voice was cheerful and undeniably too loud. Loki had murmured his response into the pillow, nevertheless the older of the Odinson’s siblings managed to fish out the words 'oblivious idiot'.

“I do not have the slightest idea why I have become the addressee of your insults again, brother, but I do feel upset about the fact that you decided to ignore yesterday’s ball completely.”

Loki sighed and slowly sat on the bedding. “I had no reasons for celebrations,” he retorted, meeting Thor’s gaze.

Thor frowned. “You mean father’s decision about the inheritance?”

Loki tsked. He didn’t want to hold that conversation with his brother. Thor was not to be blamed for their father’s faults, and Loki was definitely not in the mood for this particular talk right now.

“Can we _not_ discuss that matter at the moment?”

“Loki, you must know I will not banish you from our house because of father’s-”

 _“Don’t_ , brother.”

жжж

“I have the highest awe for your body’s ability to adopt to such amount of alcohol consumed.”

Tony grinned at his friend’s remark and Steven couldn’t suppress a smile himself.

“I was sure you would not be able to join us today. At least not for breakfast.”

“I thought you knew me well enough to not experience such fears,” Tony replied, then his attention moved to his cousin.

“My dearest Jane, you are extraordinarily quiet today.”

Jane moved her gaze from the plates to Tony, her face coloured by a light blush. Still, she didn’t say anything.

“I think Miss Foster’s mind still won’t leave yesterday’s ball,” noted Steven. Tony noticed Jane’s unintentional smile the moment Captain Rogers mentioned last evening and he knew he wouldn’t let go of the subject now.

“What would be the reason for it?”

“Well, you see, my dear friend,” started Steven when he swallowed his bit of scrambled eggs. “When you left for your night walk, Miss Foster spent the rest of the night in the company of officer Odinson. What’s more, I dare to say, she truly enjoyed that company.”

“Is that true, Jane?”

Jane looked at Tony and finally found her voice. “Captain Rogers speaks only the truth, my dear cousin. I found Mr. Odinson’s company delightful and I have my highest hopes that he had thought the same of mine.”

“Oh, Jane, I always have to force everything from you. If that is the case, I shall invite the Odinson’s brothers for dinner on Monday. I will send a servant right away,” decided Tony, and Jane’s smile had assured him the resolution was indeed felicitous.

There was also a small part of his motives towards this motion that Tony didn’t wish to reveal. He remembered well his conversation with the raven-haired Mr. Odinson the previous night. He did not forget the promise he made just before he left, and he did not wish to retreat from it. He as well memorized the feelings that elevated inside of him about the young scientist. He stopped trying to attach blame to the alcohol for those emotions. He was completely sober and still wanted to take Loki Odinson apart. And though the moment his eyes had fixed with green ones for the first time, his senses had screamed _trouble_ , Tony didn’t withdraw, didn’t stop. He didn’t want to.

Steven always said that Tony’s ignorance for the lucid menace would be the one to destroy him.

жжж

“You are such a hermit, cousin,” Jane’s voice was so falsely accusative that it was almost on the verge of a laugh. Everyone of Tony’s friends knew that he was social to a certain extent and the times when he needed his solitude were inevitable.

“I planned to work this afternoon and I think that fresh air may stimulate my mind just rightly.”

“You were supposed to _rest_ here.”

“My mind rebels at stagnation, Miss Foster, and you are well aware of that. I shall see you at dinner.” Tony bowed and left Jane sitting on the bench in the garden.

Weather was eminently charming, the sun was warming the air while a gentle wind was freshening the atmosphere. Tony had planned to spend some time by the lake since he had arrived. It was barely a  forty minute walk from the estate. He was convinced it would be an excellent place to work. He took his sketchbook with him and wanted to focus on his newest project.

However, when he finally reached his destination, he discovered he was not the only one who thought about visiting the lake this afternoon. The younger of the Odinson brothers was sitting in the shadow of a tree, wind brushing his black hair, eyes fixed on the lake. He was throwing small rocks into the water, unsettling the surface.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Odinson,” exclaimed Tony as he got closer. Loki turned his head towards him in  surprise, he had not heard him coming.

“Oh, Mr. Stark,” he said, mysterious smile dancing on his lips. Tony sat on the grass near the young scientist without permission to join. He did not expected a caveat and indeed none came.

“I heard you sent my family an invitation for dinner,” accosted Loki.

“I did send an invitation, but for your brother and you, Mr. Odinson,” corrected Tony and Loki’s eyebrows rose in a mien of astonishment.

“I thought your servant must have misunderstood your bidding.”

“I invited your brother because my cousin Jane had come to like him in a promising manner and I invited you, Mr. Odinson, because I believe we have some issues to discuss. I advisedly did not invite your father because I do not wish his presence. As far as I’m concerned you should not be so astounded about that fact.”

Tony caught the little smirk of satisfaction that crossed Loki’s face for a second. Though, he quickly composed himself and donned a mask of indifference.

“You mentioned that we do have something to discuss. Does that mean you remember that pledge of yours from last night?”

Nonetheless Loki tried to sound casual, but the note of hope in his last question did not go unheard and made Tony’s stomach twist bizarrely.

“I do remember it, and I have no intention of retreat. I may be a man who tends to talk too much, but I assure you that that promise was not empty words.”

Loki’s fist tightened on the rock he was clenching in his hand. For a few minutes they lasted in silence.

_“Why?”_

The query was sudden and caught Tony off guard. He looked at the raven-haired Odinson questioningly.

“Why are you so eager to fund my research? You do not know me. You did not even asked me what I desire to study,” he hesitated for a moment. “And as I wish to fulfil my aims I do not want it to be based on pity.”

Tony blinked rapidly a few times. He did not expect this turn of events.

“I did _not_ decide to support you because I pitied you!”

“Then _why_? I do not understand. It is utterly irrational.”

Tony fixed their gazes. Loki’s green eyes were indeed full of bewilderment.

“You scientists! Everything must be rational,” Tony sighed.

“You are a man of science as well, Mr. Stark.”

“I will fund your research because I _want to_. I may not know you, but you intrigued me enough to trust you will not waste my money. Take it as my caprice if you need a reason.”

Loki stayed silent for another minute, just looking the American in the eyes. Tony held his gaze. “You are an odd man, Mr. Stark.”

“At least I’m not boring.”

Loki laughed, fully genuine for the first time, without any forced notes in it. Tony found himself unreasonably fond of the sound.

“If you do not have any doubts about my credibility any more, I’d like to postpone discussing the matter in details to Monday, when I believe you _will_ visit me with your brother. This place makes me tremendously lazy,” said Tony, looking around with content. The lake and it’s vicinity were sublime, he was positive that he will come here more often.

Loki smiled which Tony acknowledged as an agreement to the delay in establishing the aspects of funding young Odinson’s research.

“Yes, I agree this place holds a unique impression. I always can rely on it when I’m seeking peace of mind,” confessed Loki. He once again started throwing rocks into the lake, letting his eyes just wander around, absorbing the surroundings. Tony, however, found himself quite enthralled by the way the shadow was playing on Loki’s face, outlining his cheekbones and giving an itchy feeling in Tony’s fingertips when he fought the sudden and ridiculous desire to touch them.

жжж

When Loki came back home, the dusk was already gathering to let the darkness swallow the world for the night. When one of the servants had informed him that the rest of Odinson family had already had their supper, he wasn’t even surprised that they didn’t bother to wait for him. He asked for some meal to be served in his room and ignoring the courtesies of saluting his parents, he headed there himself. He was in a exceptionally good mood and he decided he wouldn’t let it go to waste because of his family.

Loki could not deny that the source of that mood was Mr. Anthony Stark himself. The afternoon by the lake spent in his company was one of the most delightful events since he had come back from London. Not only because he got his reassurance about the funds, and again he had a chance for better future, but the conversations with the American were mostly entertaining. For his ludicrous amusement Loki blamed the lack of a mind matching his that he suffered from since he had left the Royal Institution. Still, as the time they spent together went by and they both felt more casual, Loki discovered that Mr. Stark possessed the same inclination towards sarcasm as him. As this kind of word-play was usually being frowned upon, it was truly stimulating to finally find an interlocutor who was not only able to counter with the same manner, but also actually appreciate Loki’s banter. As Stark said himself, he was a gabbler, but something about his person made Loki fain to talk as well. As it turned out during their first meeting – even talking too much. Loki would lie if he said he wasn’t concerned about the fact that he had told the American about his difficulties. He was not a person who opened himself up to strangers. Truly, he never opened up to anyone. But the mixture of alcohol and Stark’s weird aura made him talk. It all turned out better than he could wish, but still, the awareness that a man he barely knew held such knowledge about him was intimidating.

Anthony Stark reminded Loki of a force of nature. Unpredictable, enchanting and uncouth, devoid of prejudices as well as restraints, of primal beauty and with a potential of easily overlooked danger within.

“You are going to be trouble, Mr. Stark,” Loki said to himself, as he dropped into his armchair. Still, that little smile would not leave his lips. He liked trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There it is, chapter two! I hope it lives up to your expectations, I'm quite anxious about it...
> 
> Anyway, I want to thank you for all the kudos and comments that you had left, they mean so much to me! I love you all! And I'm sorry I didn't manage to reply to all of the comments, I'm having quite weird week.
> 
> Again, thanks for my awesome beta Jordyn!


	3. Distractions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “It seems there is huge probability that my cooperation with Mr. Stark will turn out quite agreeable.”

When Monday had come, Tony would never admit he was looking forward to it. There was nothing exceptionally worth his augmented attention - _only_ the dinner with Odinson brothers.

The last conversation he held with Loki by the lake was haunting him throughout rest of the weekend. He was amazed by how pleasant it was to just talk with the raven-haired scientist and how incredibly intelligent he was. Tony started to catch himself missing Loki’s company while spending time with Jane and Steven. There were topics they could not follow and almost every sarcastic comment that escaped Tony’s lips was accompanied by Captain’s look of disapproval. And that was not a feedback that Tony desired. He longed for scathing remarks and a playful sparkle in incredibly green eyes.

Of course it was not like Tony desiderated for anyone’s company. He never needed anyone and he never would. That would be absurd. Why would he need anyone? And he definitely was not asking himself this question while he was entering the dining room.

“How are you, my dear Jane?” Tony smiled, one of his eyebrows raised in a meaningful expression. He was almost grateful for Jane being nervous about their guests – he could mock his cousin and stop contemplating his stupid notions.

“Oh, cousin, you always have to be so currish!” Jane replied as she was smoothing the curves of her dress for the fourth time.

Tony shrugged, smiling apologetically. However, his eyes stayed fixed on his cousin. He wondered if she was in love. He was always curious about the thing. He heard about the women who said that they would marry a man only out of love, and that the money would not matter in comparison to true feelings. Love was supposed to make you feel like you could fly and making one put to side their own interest in favour of that other person. In Tony’s mind it was just a nuisance. He didn’t even believe in parental love, which was supposed to be unconditional, so how could he believe that such attachment can develop towards a stranger?

The Odinson brothers were punctual. Dinner started with obligatory courtesies that were followed by casual conversations. Tony said what was required from a host, but then Steven, Jane and Thor took the lead. His eyes were meeting with Loki’s from time to time, but they both didn’t join the conversation, eating in silence.

It was Thor who decided to engage Tony into the chat. “So, I heard you are a man of science like my brother, Mr. Stark.”

“Well, I would not dare to compare myself to such a bright mind as your brother, Mr. Odinson. He is a genuine scientist of respectful standard. I am just the mere heir of my father’s legacy.” Tony said in his usual dismissive manner.

“I beg to differ.” suddenly Loki joined the conversation, putting down his cutlery. “Mr. Stark is an inventor of world-class. Thanks to his technical mind many items have been enhanced, especially in weaponry. I thought you would be aware of that, brother, it’s your domain as an army man.”

“I would not call my little improvements a world-class measures.” contravened Tony, his eyes fixed with the mischievous green ones.

“You value yourself too low, Mr. Stark. When I was in London your designs were topics of debate more than once. In a complimentary manner.”

“Then I believe the Royal Institution must find themselves out of matters to discuss more than once.”

Loki smirked and it was then that Tony realized he and Loki, who had been silent during the whole  meal, had just had a discussion just between them two, behaving like they were alone in the room. Still, he did not feel awkward or did not feel the need for apologising for this odd exchange of words between them. He felt the gaze of Jane and Steven on him, but didn’t move, his eyes still fixed on Loki’s. He felt the sudden urge to pin Loki to the wall and gaze into those damned green eyes until he would see how the raven-haired scientist works.

The rest of the dinner went by as fast as its first part. Thor, Jane and Steven holding the conversation, from time to time trying to engage two men of science into it, and failing at most attempts.

Tony decided to skip the dessert.

“I think I am done with eating for today.” he announced as he stood up. “If the younger Mr. Odinson wishes to eat the afters I won’t disturb him, but after he is done, I would be honoured to welcome him in my study. I believe we have some issues to discuss.”

“Indeed we do, Mr. Stark. I think I will skip the dessert and join you right away.” Loki replied as he also got to his feet.

“Splendid.”

They both left the dining room escorted by three pairs of eyes full of astonishment and incomprehension.

Once they entered Tony’s study, Loki had immediately approached the bookshelf, studying the titles.

“Impressive collection. Makes me really envious.” admitted Loki and Tony couldn’t suppress a grin.

“I would have no objections to you borrowing any of the positions you desire to read.”

For the next few minutes they stayed in silence, Loki still browsing the books, while Tony observed him, curious which of the volumes the young scientist will decide to get off the shelf to examine more closely.

“To be honest, I thought you would have some questions for me today, Mr. Stark.”

Loki was still scanning the bookshelf, his back turned to the interlocutor.

“Concerning your research?” precised Tony.

“Exactly.” Loki corroborated as he removed _Transactions of the Royal Irish Academy_ from the shelf and perused through the table of contents.

Tony did not manage to speak his mind when suddenly a rapid knock on the door filled the room.

“Come in.”

“Mr. Stark, I am terribly sorry to disturb you, but a telegram of utmost priority came a minute ago.”

Tony waved at the servant to hand him the message.

“You may leave.” he said when his eyes were already scanning the text. Loki observed the whole situation from his spot by the bookshelf.

“Damned idiots!” Tony shouted, hitting the desk with his fist. Loki flinched at the sudden outburst but  approached the American, looking at the message over his shoulder.

“What happened?”

Tony frowned, crumpling the telegram in his hand. “Well, there are problems with selling the rights to few of my patents. Mr. Potts, my assistant, did not supervised it himself and now _I_ will have to go to London to yell at them so they would come to an agreement” forced smile formed on his lips. “Running a company is so troublesome.”

“When do you need to leave?”

“Today.”

“Then I guess I’ll stop disturbing you, Mr. Stark. Looks like we will be forced to meet again to discuss our business.” Loki took another step ahead, definitely invading Tony’s personal space. Tony didn’t dare to move or turn around to face him, feeling the other’s man breath on his cheek. “I’m borrowing that book.” Loki said, leaning even more, his lips almost touching Tony’s ear. “See you soon, Mr. Stark.”

Loki left the room, not bothering to wait for the reply from the American. Tony stayed in his spot for another minute. He suddenly forgot all about the patents and London, and found himself fighting the urge to run after the raven-haired Odinson and demand an explanation to... No. He didn’t want an explanation. He wanted to ignore the reason and morals, he wanted to take Loki Odinson apart and just surrender himself to this ridiculous _lust_.

Tony almost jumped when Steven walked into the room. “What happened? Younger Mr. Odinson just told us that his brother and him need to leave immediately.”

In response he threw the squashed telegram into his friend’s hands. “Would you tell the servants to prepare my baggage, please?” And with that he left the study. He needed to be alone.

жжж

“What are you so pleased about, brother?” Thor asked him when a smirk wouldn’t left Loki’s lips on their way back.

“It seems there is huge probability that my cooperation with Mr. Stark will turn out quite agreeable.”

Thor raised his eyebrows in a confused expression but didn’t ask any more questions.

The second he left Tony’s study, Loki had a moment of doubt for going with his instincts without cogitation. But only a moment. He did not regret what he did. At all. He may be a scientist, but recently, rationality was not his desirable companion. Finally, he was having _fun_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank for all kudos and comments! They make me really really happy and motivate to write more and update sooner :)
> 
> And special thanks to Jordyn! You're awesome! :*


	4. Unreasonings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’re worrying about modesty now? I’m afraid we would not have a chance of any acts that are not pre-marriage.”

Tony remained in London for two weeks.

He loved developing cities, his temperament of a futurist making him find exceptional beauty in ubiquitous buzzing streets with their ends lost in fog and smoke, walks through the city unavoidable to occur without the astir mixture of poor and affluent, each few moments passing a church, or a market-place, or a green square, or a theatre, every now and then catching a glimpse of the Thames dotted with the steamers - all of it painting mosaic of expansion and  _living_.

Nonetheless, this time he had found himself swiftly exhausted with the city. Heavy air and the unavoidable crowds kept reminding him why he had decided to temporarily settle in the province. Though, it was the affair that brought him to London in the first place that spoiled his stay the most. His English business partners were the reminiscent of the reason why he employed Potts to attend those meetings for him. He was not made to handle such issues, making remarks that shouldn’t be said aloud and rapidly losing interest in the discussion. He was good at sitting alone in his workshop and inventing, not discussing the rights to his designs with  _idiots_. Although, usually when he was forced to attend those meetings, he was finding relaxation of mind in the evenings while drinking with mindless company, this time he couldn’t find an iota of enjoyment in this kind of pastime.

He came back to Netherfield Park with the problem resolved, but he himself tired and full of frustration. Nonetheless, Steven and Jane had greeted him with outstanding enthusiasm.

“It was getting tedious here without your annotations, Tony.” Steve managed to get a tired smile from him during dinner.

“No wonder, I would be missing myself as well.” replied Tony, feeling the uptight finally wearing off. “How did you keep yourselves entertained when I was gone?”

“The older of the Odinson brothers had paid us a visit a few times.” said Steven and Tony’s gaze automatically moved to Jane.

“Will you satiate my curiosity, dear cousin, and tell how are you relations with Mr. Odinson developing?” Tony couldn’t suppress a meaningful grin. Though he always wore a mask of mockery, he really wished the best for Jane. Her only response was a blush and disapproving look.

“I would say really promising,” Steven decided to support the lady. “Mr. Odinson seemed to become demurely interested in Miss Foster.”

“I believe that topic is getting dreary.” Jane deftly reached for the change of subject. “How was London, cousin?”

“Horrible and overcrowded. You both know I am devoted to progress and industrialization, but it appears I really do need a longer escape to the countryside.”

There was also one other thing that haunted him since he left Netherfield Park, making him eager to come back, a thing which existence he did not want to admit even to himself. During his stay in the capital his mind was occupying itself with Loki Odinson a little too often. The raven-haired scientist seemed to crawl into Tony’s thoughts with his mischievous smiles, rare laughs and ambiguous behaviour, and didn’t care that he definitely should not linger there. When Tony was getting back, a ridiculous anxiety had burgeoned inside of him, making him hesitant about what did he actually fear – the possibility that the bizarre connection between them will turn out as a misinterpretation and the proper truth will reveal itself after the separation  _or_ the possibility that he did not misread anything and he was indeed getting into genuine trouble.

It was probably that anxiety that led him – despite the disapproval of his companions - for a lone walk after dinner. A walk that aimed undeniably for the lake.

Tony did not stop when he saw that Loki was actually there, standing under the same tree as the last time, his back leaning on the stub, again throwing rocks into the water. Tony did not stop to think. He did not think.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Odinson.”

“Why did you dispute with me then? I was trying to prove to Thor that you earned for your own name, but you contra-posed to everything that I said.”

For a moment Tony had to consider if he missed something vital. “What?”

“You are aware what conversation I am referring to, Mr. Stark, do not make a fool of yourself  _again.”_  Loki still hadn’t looked at him, eyes fixated on the circles dispersing on the surface of the water. “I have been waiting for two weeks to put that query, you could as well please me and answer it.”

Tony managed to compose himself and smirked. “I would not miss a chance to please you, Mr. Odinson.” He paused for a moment before he responded to the key question. “I simply am not bothered about the opinion that society holds of me.”

“But that night, when we drank the wine, You told me that you detest living in your father’s shadow.” Loki retorted, his green eyes finally meeting the American’s. “Why would you do that then?”

“Perhaps I care what opinion  _you_  hold of me.” he said as he approached Loki closer.

“Why?”

“You really like that question, don’t you, Mr. Scientist?” Tony took another step towards the other man, their eyes fixed. Loki did not flinch at the shrinking space between them and Tony forgot why he was supposed to be concerned about keeping a reasonable distance in the first place. He rested his hands on the bark on the both sides of Loki’s head. Loki’s lips were slightly parted, almost welcomingly, as his breath hastened, his eyes watching Tony studiously.

“God, I want to take you apart.” Tony said before he realized what he was doing, but he did not have a lot of time to focus on regret as Loki closed the distance between them entirely. His lips were soft and ravenous, and Tony responded before reason would even consider making it’s entrance; sensitive brushing of the mouth quickly evolved into a  bruising kiss. Loki’s long fingers dived into American’s hair in desperation. This whole act was made of desperation, as they bit each other’s lips then to leave a tender kiss in the same place the next second, frantically needing  _everything_  they could put into this, because after  _this_  were only consequences.

When they were forced to part in need of a breath, Tony’s lips wandered to Loki’s jaw, leaving feathery kisses, his crossing ending in the teasing nibble of the younger man’s earlobe. Loki suppressed a moan, his hands slithering down from Tony’s hair to rest on his chest. He gripped the American’s shirt and drew him down until they rested on the grass. Their lips found each other again, Tony deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring the other man’s mouth, taking advantage from his position as he bestrode over Loki. He smirked against Loki’s lips as he felt his elevated hips seeking friction with Tony’s. Tony started to pull Loki’s shirt out of his trousers, his hand greedily stroking scientist’s abdomen.

Loki’s barging Tony off him was rapid, unexpected and  _mostly unwelcomed._

“What...?”

“You need to get off.”

“You’re worrying about modesty  _now_? I’m afraid we would not have a chance of any acts that are  _not_  pre-marriage.”

Loki rolled his eyes. “There’s someone coming.”

Tony needed to use all of his will to focus on anything beside Loki. Then he actually heard it, a pair of female giggles, the sound carried by the water. A few seconds later two young women emerged from the forest at the other end of the lake. If their eyes accidentally landed on Loki and Tony... Tony swallowed hard as he dropped on the grass at an appropriate distance from Loki. They both laid there in silence, staring at the sky. The consequences were crushing them gradually as the heat of the moment was wearing off.

“I do not regret it.”

Loki sighed in response. “It... It’s not about regretting, it—“

“Loki.”

Loki was pole-axed as he rapidly turned his head towards the American. There was a peculiar sparkle in his wide green eyes that Tony couldn’t interpret. Tony decided he didn’t regret daring to call him by his first name if that was the reaction he was given. Loki was so marvellously unpredictable.

“Loki—“ he repeated, liking the way the word rolled off his tongue. “You are aware I do not care about society’s estimation and the conventions. You won’t make me believe you didn’t feel  _that_.”

Loki assumed sitting position. His lips twisted in a crooked smile as yanked a tuft of grass. “This lust is a death wish,  _Tony_.”

Tony opened his mouth but found himself at a loss of words. He growled feeling suddenly helpless. He hated that feeling.

“Scientists. Always too rational.”

There was a shift in Loki’s expression and he snorted dismissively as he scattered the blades of grass he had still held in his hand.

“Goodbye, Mr. Stark.” Loki stood up and receded without looking back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay with adding new chapter! I will try to make up for it and make next one longer than usual ;)
> 
> Thank you again for all the kudos and comments! They make me unbelievably happy! :*
> 
> I just noticed that in the end notes of the 1st chapter I wrote that the story will have about 5 chapters. Well, I don't know if that is good information or not, but it's gonna be longer than that. I've got few new ideas that will lengthen it a bit ;)
> 
> Special thanks to Jordyn! You're awesome, as always <3


	5. Moths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I thought you considered it improper.”

The following day greeted Tony with extremely hot weather and the the impossible-to-eradicate feeling of unfinished business.

“The heat is killing me.” Tony exclaimed, feeling how the clothes were sticking to his skin with every move.

“You are not the only one suffering from it, Tony, this time we really didn't need your remark on that.”

Tony's eyebrows raised in a perplexed expression. “If weather makes Captain Rogers almost offensive, then undeniably the hell has risen on Earth.”

“It certainly makes  _you_  more insufferable.”

“I would eloign myself from your sight, but I will melt if I allow myself any rapid moves right now.” Tony replied, his attitude sharper towards his friend more than usual, his pride still jagged by Loki the day before.

Jane sighed. “Why don't you both go by that lake you had come to liking, cousin? I'm sure it will cool you just rightly.”

“Marvellous idea, miss Foster.” Steven revivified, but Tony shook his head.

“Is that a negation, Tony? I remember you were charmed by the place. It was the first place you went after your return from London.”

“As you said, I was there yesterday. Too much of a good thing, my dear friend.”

Jane and Steven exchanged confused looks but Tony closed his eyes and tried to relax on his deckchair - they took it as the end of the discussion and didn't ask any more questions.

Tony, on the other hand, decided that he can indeed get even hotter, though the moment before he was sure that any more heat would give him a stroke. Though, this time the heat was coming from the inside, at the memory of  _the lake_. Loki's pale lips on his, those long fingers in his hair, on his neck... He never felt such desire before, even though he never cared about decency, and women of the same life philosophy had always sensed that. He had no intention of marry, relationships and emotions were just not his thing and he would not burden himself with a wife just because it was expected of him - but the desire and sex were a different thing. He liked it. It gave zest to life and he was not to refuse himself some pleasure because of courtesies.

But this time with the raven-haired Odinson, it was different. Not only because the object of the American’s interest was a male (it was a little of a surprise to find himself attracted to another male, but Tony has learnt that fighting the choices of his own body was useless, he never won). Loki called it lust, but there was more than that. Tony wanted to crawl into his head and see what made him tick. It reminded him of his childhood, when every time he came across something fascinating, he took it apart to see how it worked (bringing his mother endless headaches and never stirring interest of his father). He always loved  _complicated_. But never with people. Machines when plain were boring, people when complicated were troublesome. But Loki was so deliciously complicated, Tony could not resist. But now he was left with overwhelming hunger for something once tasted and no promise of another bite.

жжж

The lake - his favourite place back home, his hideout and playground of the childhood, and now all the memories of it were overwhelmed by Tony Stark's lubricious hands and soft lips.

“Damn you, Stark.” Loki was murmuring for the unnumbered time this evening. He was gasping for the cool waters of the lake whole day throughout the killing heat. But somewhere in the back of his head was the fear that he would meet the American. Foolish fear, because Loki made  _a decision_  before he left his chambers for the breakfast (and regretting his escape the moment he turned his back on Stark). He was fearing for himself, feeling he wasn't confident for his own actions.

_I want to take you apart._

Those damned six words wouldn't leave his head, like they somehow had been burned onto his mind. How could this phrase affect him so? Those were not the words of a  _rational_  man ...but Loki had never cared about decency. Tony was calling Loki rational, but that wasn’t the truth at all.

And the fact that Tony was a  _man_  in the first place. Well, Loki’s decision of never involving himself into marriage wasn’t based on focusing on his scientific career  _only_. His body decided for him to pass alone through life. He never thought he would meet someone willing, someone ready to take such risk. And then Anthony Stark waltzed into his life with his own vision of world, uncaring of anyone’s opinion of him, messing with everything that Loki had already set in his life.

Was it their unique insanity that was pulling them together so temptingly that it became impossible to resist?

жжж

When the night was gradually embracing the world with darkness and the evening didn't bring desired chill, Loki couldn't been stopped anymore. The moon was shining brightly, welcomingly, and it felt like there was something actually dragging him there.

When he arrived, the first thing he noticed was a pile of clothes near his tree - a pair of shoes, a gilet and a jacket. Scientist’s eyes searched for their owner only a split second.

Tony Stark was near the waterside, at a depth that allowed him to have the ground under his feet, the line of water reaching his elbows. He was observing Loki, a question painted on his features. As Loki stood there (for a minute or an hour or a dozen), just looking at the American, engulfed by the uncertainty in those eyes, which brown shade he seemed to see even in this darkness. Suddenly Loki knew why he felt summoned to this place tonight. He was like a moth, beckoned to the playful gleam of fire, the danger not deterring but making him even more pliable. He knew he would get burnt but he didn’t want to flee. He  _wanted_  to be incinerated.

Without breaking the eye contact, Loki climbed a slight prominence to his left. He didn’t hesitate when he took of his shoes and jacket. He knew this lake like his own hand. He smiled to himself, letting go, succumbing, and jumped into the dark water.

When he swam approaching the other man, the American didn't move. He observed Loki, desire glistening in his eyes. Loki almost flung at him.

“This was  _my_ plan for the evening, Mr. Stark.” he said. “You seem to be claiming my lake.”

Tony smiled in response. “Still, tonight, I was here first.”

“ _Pardon_ me, do you wish me to leave?”

Loki observed how droplets of water travelled down from the brown hair, crossing his cheeks, trailing along the other man’s neck. He wanted to follow them with his tongue.

“Do _you_ wish to leave?”

As an answer, Loki took a step closer making their hips meet. He put his hands on Tony's waist.

“I thought you considered it improper.”

“I forgot  _I do what I want._ ” Loki replied, but there was still a smidgen of suspense in Tony as he queried with somehow forced playfulness.

“And what do you want?”

“You.” Loki said against Tony's lips and the American smiled before the teasing touch turned into a kiss.

This time there was no haste, when the doubts were left to the side, they finally could explore one another, indulging into the thrill of the moment. Tony sunk his hands into wet raven hair, pulling Loki even closer, nibbling his lips teasingly. Loki laughed but let him continue, still didn’t manage to be docile for very long. His hands were stroking American’s back, longing the feeling of skin on skin, then Loki actually bit the other man’s lip, asking for more. Tony’s mouth moved lower.

“You have too many clothes on.” he commented against Loki’s neck, pulling at scientist’s shirt. Loki helped to remove the soaked cloth, letting it drift into the water, he knew he probably wouldn’t regain it, but he didn’t care.

Minutes later they found themselves laying on the shore, drenched and wanting, but the odds seemed to never be in their favour. When later – and too soon - Tony started trembling from cold, they knew the time to part had come.

“I don't want this night to end.”

“I know.”

жжж

When Thor Odinson had visited Netherfield Park next day and asked for a meeting with Mr. Stark, Tony's first reaction was fear. If Loki's brother had somehow found out... Even though the vision of the soldier beating him up wasn't really appealing, he was more afraid that as a result he may never see the raven-haired scientist again.

The fear turned into relief when the older of Odinson brother entered his study with a beam on his face, cheerful as ever.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Stark. It's a pleasure to see you again!”

“I could say the same," Tony smiled. “Please, take a seat.”

“I've come to you, Mr. Stark, as to a man representing Miss Foster. I must say I have an intention of making a proposal of marriage to her.”

Tony didn't see that coming. He knew Jane and the officer had enjoyed each other’s company but he didn’t suspect that they already shared an affection which may have lead to nuptial. Those two weeks in London made him miss quite a lot.

Or maybe he was paying too much attention to the other brother.

“I do like to think of myself as Jane's guardian, but I am merely her cousin.” Tony's tone automatically changed to more severe than his usual chatter. “I’m afraid such proposal must be directed to her aunt. Mrs. Pemberton is Jane's mother's sister and the wielder of her dower. She resides in America.”

Thor frowned, but Tony spoke again before he managed to express any of his worries.

“Nonetheless, if my dear cousin will accept your proposal, Mr. Odinson, I am ready to write to Mrs. Pemberton a letter of recommendation in case of any doubts.”

The officer blinked rapidly a few times, before he was beaming again.

“I have no words to express my gratitude, Mr. Stark.”

Tony just smiled, wondering what would Thor say if he knew that the man he considered being indebted to was perilously engaged into the romance with his younger brother.

“I also came here with an invitation for a dinner with my family tomorrow, for Miss Foster, your friend Mr. Rogers and you, Mr. Stark.”

“I will be delighted to come and I'm sure Jane and Steven will be as well.”

Thor smiled again. He was such a positive and simple man. So different from his brother.

“My parents are really looking forward to meeting Miss Foster again.” the officer confessed. “Last time they didn’t have an opportunity to talk to her properly. I do hope my father will concede my choice.”

Tony felt his polite mien collapse at the mention of the man of the main house Odinson. He still remembered how he treated Loki and how the scientist looked devastated during the night they met.

“Did I say anything out of place, Mr. Stark?” Thor must have noticed the change of expression at the American’s face. Tony swiftly evoked the smile back to his lips.

“My apologies, I didn’t indicate to offense you in any way,” he said. “It’s just, I’m a man of futuristic manner, Mr. Odinson. Sometimes I find customs of our age preposterous.”

Thor raised his eyebrows in surprised expression but then a knowing smile painted on his lips. “I see now why my brother has found a companion in you, Mr. Stark.”

When Tony couldn’t find words to express his perplexity, Thor answered his unformed query. “You two are very similar, but differ in ways that makes you indeed a match for a great companionship.”

Oh, if Thor only knew what he just said.

“I will disturb you no more, Mr. Stark. I look forward to your visit tomorrow.”

“Me too, Mr. Odinson.”

When the door closed after the officer, Tony went limp in his chair. He got himself into a mess. But he would laugh at anyone that would tell him to even try to entangle out from it.

“Oh god, I’m  _mad..._ And in need of a drink. Definitely. _”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am incredibly sorry for the delay. I left for a few days by the sea (the only vacation journey I got), my friend stayed for a weekend for my b-day and then my beta got problems with her compter. Overall, it resulted in this chapter being inexcusably late. I can just hope you will enjoy it, after all, now.
> 
> Love and kisses for every comment and kudos that I get!
> 
> Get ready, next chapter will finally certify this ff for it's rating. And I am incredibly nervous about writing it! D:


	6. Desires

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Well, I gave your father a chance. If he’s still an imbecile that he was, then I am snatching you for myself.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. So, I know all of you must have thought I abondoned this story. But as you can see, I didn't. I won't even start with excuses for such a delay. I just hope some of you will still read it. This chapter was extremely hard to write and I'm still not satisfied how it turned out (but at least it's quite long).
> 
> Unfortunately, it's NOT beta'd. My beta can't find a moment to check it for two weeks now, so I decided to post it like this. So I'm sorry for any mistakes you'll find. My English still needs improvement and without beta you may encounter some grammar mistakes.  
> I'll just correct it when I get the beta'd version.
> 
> I'm sorry for the delay again! Forgive me(?).

This time the vision of visiting Odinson’s mansion did had a more thrill to it.

Tony couldn’t stop wondering how he would manage to act indifferently around Loki. He just hoped that the majority of the meeting would be focused on Thor and Jane. There was no reason for General Odinson to be bothered about Tony, now that it was acknowledged that he didn’t hold the favour of being Jane’s legal guardian.

Unfortunately, he was wrong.

Tony was seated opposite Loki, which was indeed lucky, giving his too often looks towards the youngest of the Odinson family might be overlooked that way. Still, to his left, at the head of the table, was the man of the house himself.

First courses were served. Tony was waiting for the obligatory pointless conversations to start any moment.

“Mr. Stark,” said the General Odinson. “I do hold the knowledge you are a man of fortune, but what exactly is your occupation?”

Tony could swear Loki’s grip on his spoon tightened.

“I inherited my business after my father,” answered Tony. “Myself, I am an inventor.”

“Any success in that?”

Tony literally bit his tongue not to reply with too much sharpness.

“Mr. Stark is one of the brightest minds of our times, father.” Loki’s tone was too forcedly calm to sound casual.

“Maybe, but do those brightest minds do anything beside gathering around rich meals and tipples to _talk_ about how the world should be arranged?”

“With all the respect, I do believe you confuse _science_ with _philosophy_.”

“I do not think so, Mr. Stark. How exactly did any scientist—“

“How do you find the percussion-cap guns, General?”

Loki seemed to be the only person in the room whose eyebrows didn’t raise in perplexity when the question dropped. The raven-haired scientist was amused, if not kind of flaunting.

“Well, I do find it extremely useful improvement to fire arms,” the man of the house burbled finally.

“I invented them.”

When Tony finally stopped admiring the look on General Odinson’s face and his gaze shifted to Loki, he nearly regretted it. The smug glint in his green eyes and the flicker of his suppressed grin made Tony overwhelmed with a desire to pin him into the very table they were eating by at the moment and kiss him mindlessly.

The meal went by quite peacefully after the harsh discussion about science. Tony wasn’t asked to voice his opinions too often and he was more than satisfied with that. Though, when the desserts were served, inventor felt a little thwarted that the visit was coming to an end. He needed more of Loki’s presence, even when they couldn’t even look at each other too extensively. But then the older of the brothers came up with a suggestion.

“It's such a beautiful day, today! We should all go for a walk.” Thor's proposal hung in the air for a moment before Jane and Mrs. Odinson both expressed enthusiasm about the idea and the rest of the party had no choice other than approval.

They somehow naturally divided. General Odinson and his older son at the front, conversing with Jane. The man of the house must had still been in the process of assessing Thor's lady of choice. Just after them walked Steven with Mrs. Odinson. Captain Rogers, being the charming man he always was, must had indeed been pleasant interlocutor and Mrs Odinson seemed delighted with his company.

Loki and Tony closed the cavalcade, struggling to keep proper distance between one another. They both longed for at least a brush of the other's hand, but they knew they were bound to keep up appearances.

“Thank you for your words in the defence of science back there,” Loki said, his eyes fixed on the road in front of them.

“You're welcome. Do you think that by any chance it would help to change your father's decision?”

Loki considered the question for a few seconds. “I don't know. I've already lost hope for that. Nevertheless, his look was worth it by itself.”

“Well, I gave your father a chance. If he’s still an imbecile that he was, then I am snatching you for myself.”

Loki raised his eyebrows, turning his gaze at the other man, a playful sparkle in those green eyes. “By what means do you intend to do that?”

“By my money financing your research or—“ he lowered his voice. “—by my irresistible charm and unforgettable kisses in the moonlight.”

Loki giggled nervously, poking the American's side with his elbow.

"You're _mad_."

"Like you didn't know. I even dare say you can't resist it."

Loki giggled again and Tony felt it resonating in his chest.

He suddenly felt somebody else's stare on him. He turned his eyes away from the scientist only to meet an amused gaze of Mrs. Odinson. She smiled at her younger son and returned to the conversation with Steven.

“What was that about?” He asked and Loki answered with some kind of embarrassment. "It's just— You won't hear me laughing at home. Not anymore at least. I just think my mother thought she overheard something."

"I'm definitely snatching you for myself."

Loki looked at him questioningly at sudden desperation in Tony's voice.

“I find myself extremely fond of your laugh, Mr. Odinson, and if they do not share that adoration, I demand a monopoly.”

At first Loki looked at him with bewilderment, but then he laughed again, loud and true, and Tony must have evoked all of his will-power not to kiss those pale lips.

This visit was going to drive him crazy of want.

жжж

Mrs. Odinson insisted that after the walk, their guests must come back to Odinson’s mansion for an afternoon tea. Their stay lengthened until evening, with Jane conquering the hearts of Thor’s parents.

Loki was finding difficulty in sitting in one place. His hands were itching to touch Tony, his words from the walk still ringing out in scientist’s mind. He never fought with such emotions before and this _struggle_ felt so ridiculously _good_.

His eyes landed on the inventor for the myriad time this day. Tony neither looked comfortable, his fingers unceasingly drumming on his thigh. Loki watched as he licked his lips in a nervy manner and abruptly felt the temperature in the room rising.

The thunder made everyone jump. A sheet of rain formed outside the windows, a sudden hum of unnumbered droplets hitting the ground filled the air.

“The tempest was to be expected after those days of heat” said Mrs. Odinson while she approached the window. Another thunder blared and Jane gasped, clasping her hand on her chest.

“We can’t let them travel through that weather, even such a short distance” Thor decided, his worried gaze fixed on Jane.

“I absolutely agree” Mrs. Odinson concurred.

“I’ll tell the servants to prepare guest bedrooms.”

жжж

It was an hour and a half when Tony heard somebody's steps on the corridor. From listening to the sounds of the mansion falling asleep, he managed to notice he was located in some far end of uninhabited wing. He seemed to be the only resident here.

The steps were approaching his chamber cautiously. Finally, there was a silent creak of the door and a known svelte silhouette entered. Without a word, Loki slid into the bed and placed a heated kiss on American’s lips. Tony groaned in response.

“I’ve been almost driven wild today, trying to keep myself away from you” confessed Tony.

“I know exactly what you mean.”

They allowed themselves a moment of mindless prolonged kisses and caresses, slowly denuding each other of every piece of clothing. They were past courtesies the moment they first locked their lips and now they were simply following their desires.

“God, Loki, I want you so much.”

Loki laughed that beautiful rare laugh and said “And I want you to take me, Mr. Stark.”

No rules applied to them anymore. They weren’t obliged to play in courtship or seek parents’ approval. The rest of the world was drown out, leaving them without restraints.

Though, the reality had to step into their dream-like act. Tony stilled them without notice. Loki reconciled and sat motionless on American’s hips, question painted on his flushed face.

“Is there anything wrong? Did I misinterpret anything?”

“No! All this, it’s like the best of dreams. It’s just– I don’t know how to— I don't want to hurt you, I've never been with a man before.”

“Don't worry” Loki's hand rested on Tony's chest, stroking his collarbone. “Just follow my instructions.”

“Does that mean you—?”

Raven-haired man lowered his eyes. “I— I was always like _this_ , Tony” he confessed. “I know the gossip about you and I know you are a man who find his taste in woman and do not deny yourself savouring the pleasures. I don't know why you suddenly took interest in the person of the same sex and I honestly don't care, I'm too happy about the general fact at all. But I'm different, I never desired woman.”

“You can't fight with the way you tick.” Tony shrugged, stroking younger man’s cheekbone. “But does that mean you had someone before?”

Loki nodded. Tony wasn't even aware that his grip on Loki's hip tightened.

“It was during the first months in the Royal Institution. There was another assistant, his name was Rene. We got along right away. But I never thought— He liked visiting those creepy little shops you can find in the strangest depths of London, especially while he was drunk. And one night we found this diary. There were memories of a traveller, the description of months he spent somewhere in Asia. To be more precise, the description of his carnal adventures. It included also the male encounters. And Rene got curious and I never hoped I would find anyone willing to try. But we did try the things from the journal. We met a few times but it couldn't have lasted, we both knew it, I—" Loki laughed nervously. "I shouldn't be telling this to you, should I?"

Tony felt almost like in a trance. There were feelings rising inside of him, emotions he didn't know he was capable of. When was he ever jealous about someone?

But right now, _oh, he was_. He felt his fingertips burning, _needing_ to touch every millimetre of Loki's pale skin where Rene could had touched him. He needed to kiss Loki, make him numb and overwrite any trace of that man in Loki's memory. He needed everything that Rene got from Loki and more. So he did and he took and he claimed.

“Tell me. Tell me what to do.”

In response Loki took his hand and put inventor’s fingers into his mouth, licking and sucking them and it had no right to be so arousing.

Next minutes blurred in Tony’s mind, overloaded with emotions, almost lost into all the new sensations, guided by Loki’s whisper-like voice.

“I can’t believe it’s happening” he said as he was probing Loki’s insides with three of his fingers, with this beautiful green-eyed man under him winded from pleasure. The other man groaned, his hand on Tony’s cock suddenly ceasing it’s movement.

“Tony, are you set to do this?”

“I believe you’ve just stolen my question.”

Loki smiled and Tony couldn’t stop himself from kissing him. He lengthened the kiss, retreating his fingers and gradually positioning himself.

“Do it, Tony, I’m begging you.”

Loki’s insides felt different than any women the American had before, different and better and tighter and Tony definitely never felt such gripe in his chest before. Scientist dug his nails in other man’s shoulder blades as Tony slid into him, searching for right angle.

“Here! Tony, _move._ ”

Tony complied and was rewarded with a moan that escaped Loki’s throat.

“God, I adore your voice” he said, setting a pace with his thrusts, leaving kisses on the other man’s neck as he temptingly tilted his head back.

“For the first time I am grateful for the lofty collars we’re forced to wear” Tony said as admired the bruise forming on pale skin in the spot where his mouth was a second ago.

Loki only laughed as a reply, overwhelmed with delight.

жжж

They were lying motionless, their hearts returning to their usual rate, Tony on his back, Loki with his head on his lover’s shoulder, their legs entwined. The bliss was still embracing them, making them eager to froze the moment, stay like that forever, next to each other, mind inundated with the other, with no concerns. The tempest was raging again, infrequent thunders lightening the room.

Tony was playing with raven-black hair, so rapt he didn’t notice that Loki discovered one of his cloaked secrets. He started when Loki brushed his fingers across the scar.

The scientist hadn't seen it before. During their moment by the lake, it was too dark to make out the details and Tony never managed to get out of the shirt. But now, once Loki discovered it’s existence, he got enthralled by it. It was almost round in shape, in the middle of inventor's chest. Loki was shadowing the shapes carved in the other man's skin with his fingertips.

“Would you tell me?” His voice was almost inaudible, like he was afraid that, after all the intimacy they shared that night, he was now crossing the line. They knew so little of each other's pasts. And Loki wanted to discover it. He was not the person to spill his heart out, his insecurities, the memories he was ashamed of or not wanted to remember. He didn't talk about himself. And Tony, with all his floods of words, was the same kind of person. But Loki wanted _all_. He wanted Tony, along with his fears and the episodes he wanted erased, every scar and the history behind it.

Tony sighed. "It's not a pleasant story. Are you certain you want to spoil the night?"

Loki's hand seemed unable to cease it’s detection of the scar.

“I just— I want to know you, every bit of you. You know so much of me that, myself, I cannot believe how you managed to get it out of me.”

Tony smiled with melancholy. “I already told you that my father and I hadn't had healthy relationship, but he had a friend who replaced him in a way. His name was Obadiah. I trusted him with my life. After my father’s death, I was never into the exact husbandry of the company, I was more interested in inventing itself. One evening, I got visited by Obadiah. He told me he would like to have full supervision of the business and I denied his proposition.” Tony sighed. “He stabbed me in the chest.” Loki turned his head abruptly towards Tony. “When I realised what’s happening, I tried to dodge and he hit my sternum.”

“What happened to him? Did he answer for his crime?”

“He’s dead.”

Loki shifted slightly.

“After he realised he didn’t wound me lethally, he reached for the prototype of the gun on my desk. But before he figured out it was blocked, I managed to grab the other prototype.” Tony took a deep breath. “I got out if it alive, but now I have that scar to remind me that it’s not worth to let your feelings lead you.”

Loki buried his face in the crook of the other man’s neck, embracing him tightly. He couldn’t find the words.

“I told you it would spoil the evening” Tony tried to laugh but it turned out broken.

“Do you still follow the rule that your scar is the reminder of?”

Tony cupped his cheek and lifted the other man’s head so their eyes could meet.

“That it’s not worth to let your feeling lead you” Loki answered the unstated query.

“I think I’ve ceased to after I moved to England and met a drunk, green-eyed scientist.”

Loki giggled and kissed Tony’s chest, right in the middle of the scar.

жжж

Loki awakened just before the dawn. The inventor was still embracing him, his body radiating pleasant heat, steady breath tickling his neck. He thought he could wake up like that everyday. However, along with arising day, a harsh reality was crawling into their oasis. Loki knew he must sneak to his bedroom before any member of his family leaves theirs. But Tony’s arms around him felt so good, so _right_ , he couldn’t deny himself few more moments of listening to American’s breathing, taking in his scent and the rhythm of his rising and lowering chest.

He finally entangled himself out of his lover’s embrace, pleased that he did not to wake him. He knew the parting would be even harder that way. With his body still sore from last night, he managed to slink out of the room, feeling himself growing colder and colder with every step away from Tony.

He knew he wouldn’t find any sleep, even when he was back into his own bed. Suddenly it was too uncomfortable, too empty.

What on Earth had they done? How would they keep themselves in distance after that night?

жжж

The breakfast was a struggle. Loki didn’t dare to meet Tony’s gaze even for a split second.

He didn’t feel shame. On the contrary, he would gladly stand up and _shout_ about was happened last night. But it would be equal in never seeing Tony again and that he would not stand. Still, being in the same room and pretending they were just acquaintances was greater effort than he expected.

He still wasn’t sure if he was pleased or cross about Tony and the rest of his party leaving while the Odinsons were all accompanying them to the door. The decision was instant and his mouth seemed to act on their own.

“Mr. Stark, I believe I still hold your book in possession. If you would attend me to my room, I would be delighted to give it back to you. I’m sorry for recalling that only now.”

Green eyes finally met the brown and Loki almost groaned.

“Of course. Jane, Steven, please wait for me those couple of minutes.”

The scientist ignored his father’s remark about delaying the departure of their guests by his forgetfulness; the only sound he heard was Tony’s footsteps as he followed him back deeply into the house.

The moment the door was shut behind them, Loki was pinned into the wall, a passionate kiss invading his lips. He moaned, pulling his lover even closer. Hot tongue in his mouth summoned up the memories of anterior night and for a moment Loki wanted to lock them both into this very room and never leave. They halted to catch a breath, their foreheads touching.

“We’re in trouble, aren’t we?”

“I dare say _trouble_ is an understatement.”


	7. Intricacies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Just take me away from here.”

It rained continuously for another three days. Tony spent them in his study, sketching contraptions that could quieten the gunshot. Though, in the end, every sheet was ripped in half and tossed across the room in a form of a ball of creased paper. He couldn’t focus. His mind was constantly escaping to the night with Loki. When had he ever _missed_ anyone?

On the third evening, Tony again passed the invitation to spend some time with Jane and his friend. They both knew that the inventor liked his solitude when he worked, nevertheless they never stopped trying to cease his rites of a hermit.

Tony was sitting in his armchair in the corner of the room, his hands playing with a book on his lap. It was the book that Loki borrowed during his visit here, when Tony didn’t even suspect that his fascination with the raven-haired man would transform into such madness, make him _feel_ and _crave_ in a way he never experienced before. The book Loki used as an excuse for their last kiss before Tony left Odinson’s mansion after that impossible night. Now Tony found himself absently reaching for it, whenever he longed for the feeling of long pale fingers on his skin; like it was the only thing that proved that his liaison with Loki was not a trick of his mind.

Tony still didn’t believe how this _all_ happened. It still felt like tomorrow he was moving into Netherfield Park, still considering if he really was in need of a vacation in the province and now he got into a romance with a man. Only three weeks ago he was wondering how people can believe in such fancies as love and now...

He tensed. Did he just think about Loki in terms of...?

He laughed nervously. His relationship with the scientist was getting out of hand. Tony never knew what exactly he expected when he let himself be guided by his longing for the scientist, but he surely didn’t anticipate to fall for him. Tony just didn’t do _love_. He could have almost any woman at his knees and he had. But he never got seriously involved. Until this broken English _man_...

Was it what _love_ felt like? This bitter-sweet element in his chest?

He would ask Jane or Steve... but they would query too. About the person that changed the stony and devoid of sentiment Anthony Stark. And he could not answer.

The failure of this correlation was inevitable. But how was he supposed to continue with his life then, if those three days without Loki were a struggle?

жжж

The rain wasn’t as heavy as throughout the last three days and Tony was pacing in circles on canopied veranda. The hum of the droplets hitting the ground was just another remainder of _the night_ , but it was an effort to stay indoors so long with his mind as his only companion. He needed a distraction, _anything._

The sound of approaching equestrian seemed to the inventor almost a blessing. There was coming his distraction. Though, Tony would lie if he said he didn’t feel anxiety rising in his chest when he saw that the rider is Thor Odinson himself.

“Mr. Stark!” he greeted him, dismounting his horse. “I have brought an urgent matter to you.”

“Then speak of it.”

Thor seemed pleased with skipping the amenities and concreteness of the American. “It concerns my brother, Loki.”

Tony felt his heart drop but managed not to hustle the officer.

“This morning he announced he is leaving for London immediately. He does not reveal any reasons for such hastiness or the need to go there in the first place. No one can convince him to speak. I thought about you, as you seemed to become his friend, Mr. Stark. I am asking you to try to talk with him. I admit I am desperate and I am trying last resorts, but I do worry about him greatly.”

“Of course I will help, Mr. Odinson.” Tony said after he managed to calm himself slightly. He almost sprung out to the Odinson’s mansion when Thor started speaking. He called out to the nearest servant to saddle the swiftest horse.

жжж

When Loki spotted Tony approaching along his brother, he ceased his discussion with a servant and sprinted out into the woods that bordered with their lands. The rain turned into a drizzle, but the scientist was soaked, slipping on the wet grass sporadically. The American left his horse with Thor and ran after his lover.

Loki was already quite deep into the forest when Tony finally caught him up.

“Loki! Stop! _Please_.”

He did stop, his back turned to the inventor, one hand leaning of the nearest tree.

“Is this true? Are you leaving for London?”

He didn’t answer, his silhouette still.

“Is this because of _us_?”

Loki laughed bitterly. “I forgot how everything must be always about you, Mr. American.”

His broken voice was like a knife being slowly spiked into Tony’s chest.

“You don’t mean those words, Loki.”

The other man turned abruptly. “Don’t act like you know me, Tony!”

“I _don’t_ ” he riposted. “But I want to help you. Please, tell me what happened.”

Loki clenched his hands into fists, fighting the sobs. He was a mess. Tony approached him slowly and put his hands on the other man’s shoulders tenderly. “Let me help you.”

The scientist lifted his head and looked into the worried brown eyes. And he broke.

He rapidly put his arms around Tony, hiding his face in the crook of the other man’s neck. Tony hugged him back tightly, massaging tensed back with his hands.

“I discovered why I am cursed by my father,” Loki took a deep breath, his voice back to normal. “Last night I overheard the conversation of two servants. The older one was narrating how she delivered my mother’s last baby. It was stillborn.”

Tony tensed and Loki recoiled slightly, so they could look at each other.

“The same day an abandoned baby was found by the army stationary. It was starved and my mother’s body was prepared to nourish. So she took the orphan and fed it, despite the grief about her own child. In the end, she raised the baby as her own. Almost no one ever knew about this...”

Tony felt his breathing quicken, the ground under his feet fleeting.

“I am the found baby. That is why father could never love me. I am not of his blood and I turned out such a disappointment after they showed me such mercy...”

Suddenly Loki slipped out of American’s hands, falling on his knees. He looked like he was on the verge of tears. Or maybe he was crying? Tony couldn’t tell, the rain still pouring, making the world even more miserable.

“Does he know?” asked Tony, kneeling in front of his lover. “Is he aware you discovered the truth?”

“Yes” the scientist gasped, his gaze fixed on the muddy ground. “I needed to speak with him... I went to him... I told him I could still make him proud, I could still be someone he won’t regret taking...”

“And— What did he reply?”

He lifted his head, green eyes meeting the brown. A smile on the pale lips that was breaking Tony’s heart.

“He said _‘No, Loki’_.”

Tony felt contradicting feelings rising inside of him. He wanted to cuddle Loki and somehow protect him from whole cruel world. And at the same time he wanted General Odinson’s blood on his hands.

“I can’t stay here, Tony. I can’t come back there. I can’t...” he was repeating, like a mantra.

Inventor took his face in his hands. “Do you have any plan? Or are you just going to figure something out when you’re in London?”

Loki laughed hysterically. “I have no idea what to do with myself.”

“Then stay with me. For a time being. We’ll think of something. Calmly. _Please_ , Loki. Don’t do anything rush.”

Loki’s voice was hollow. “Just take me away from here.”

“I won’t let you _fall_ because of this.”

жжж

Loki was already heading for Stark’s estate, when the inventor was dealing with Thor.

“I think you should query your father about the reason for your brother’s conduct” he explained, trying his best to refrain himself from ‘ _speaking’_ with General Odinson on his own. “I managed to coax him to stay at my place - it’s better than a haste journey to London. He needs space and I am fain to look after him until he appeases his mind. I will inform you about his condition regularly.”

“Thank you, Mr. Stark, for your assist. I was awfully worried about this outburst of his. I am just glad he is not putting himself in any trouble by sudden leave for the city. I believe he will be in good hands. Though, my mind is still not at peace regarding the mysterious motives for his behaviour.”

“As I said, that is to be elucidated with your parents, Mr. Odinson. I should leave.”

“Of course. I believe I will be seeing you soon, Mr. Stark.”

Tony commanded the servants to bring Loki’s baggage to Netherfield Park and hurried there himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Quite short update. But I believe it's better than month-long breaks. I guess._
> 
> _Still not beta'd._
> 
> _And thanks again for all the comments and kudos. They're really, really appreciated! :*  
> _


	8. Assuagements

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I need to feel _wanted._ Please..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Still not beta'd. Sorry for any grammar mistakes._

Jane and Steven were waiting on the porch, confusion written on their faces. But Tony was the first to ask questions.

“Has he arrived yet?”

“Yes, Mr. Odinson was guided to your study, as you supposedly told him to.”

“Good, good,” he murmured, dismounting his horse. He told the waiting servant to prepare a guest room in the east wing and that the luggage that would soon arrive was to be taken there as well.

“I will elucidate later,” was the only explanation Tony's friends heard before he hurried inside.

жжж

Loki was sitting in one of the armchairs with his legs tucked to himself and surrounded by his arms, like he was trying to embrace himself. He was still soaked and trembling from cold. Tony approached him, kneeled in front of the armchair and took the frozen hands into his own.

“I told the servant to prepare a hot bath for you,” he said in a delicate voice. Loki didn’t answer. It looked like he was lost in his own mind, unable to surface from the sorrow and impuissance that so suddenly overwhelmed him. He took a breath, like he was preparing to say something, and hold it for a few seconds till any words left his lips.

“My whole life was a lie,” scientist finally said. He choked out a broken laugh. “Do you know that my namesake from the mythology was also a god of lies? What a beautiful irony.”

“It wasn't all a lie, Loki.” Tony contradicted with steady voice. “You're a talented physicist with bright mind. Don't understate that! And...” he hesitated. “Us. We're not a lie,” he dared to say.

Loki's eyes widened, staring into the man in front of him. He reminded Tony of a scared animal.

“You’re only saying that because I’m wrecked now. What we are - is an evanescent blunder.”

The American squeezed cold hands that still rested in his own and raised them into his mouth, leaving a kiss on the pale knuckles.

“I won’t believe that. I refuse to diminish what we have.”

Loki shook his head from left to right incessantly, like he was trying to convince himself otherwise.

Suddenly a knock on the door pealed in the room. Tony stood up, making a step back. “Come in.”

Petite woman entered the room and bowed slightly. “The room is prepared.”

Loki stood up and silently followed the servant.

жжж

Tony wasn't nervous about roaming around the east wing during the night. Both Steven and Jane were abiding the west wing; along with all the servants. Tony claimed the other part of the mansion for himself, turning its dining area into his workshop. As he tended to work late at night, no one ever marvelled that the inventor was alienating himself in his own part of the property. He could work at any hour he desired and do not disturb anyone. East wing was his and he was the only resident there - until tonight. Tonight one of the guest rooms wasn't empty.

Tony entered without knocking, as Loki did that memorable night. Raven-haired man was sitting on his bed, in the same cringed position as in the study earlier. Tony approached him slowly and sat at the end of the bed.

“You didn't even touch your meal,” he said, staring at the food he ordered to be served there. But there was no real resentment in his voice.

Honestly, he felt hopeless. He had never been in such a situation before. He never cared about anyone that much. And now as that someone was so broken, he was ready to do anything to make them feel better. But he didn't know how.

“Tell me what can I do for you, Loki. _Anything_.”

Suddenly Loki moved closer and crushed their lips together. The American was taken by surprise by that unexpected kiss, but he returned it with passion.

“I need...” The scientist started, but swiftly hesitated. “I need to feel _wanted_. Please... Just take me. Make my mind cease to work - as only you can.”

 As a reply, Tony kissed his lover’s neck, pushing his chest slightly with strong hands. The moment he was laying down, inventor’s fingers unbuttoned Loki’s shirt and then went down and started working on removing the trousers. American caressed pale skin on the other man’s collarbone with his tongue. If this was what Loki wanted, he would deliver. Himself, he was still starving for any second in Loki’s company and found himself swiftly drunk on the moment, forgetting the problems and rough reality.

Loki was already panting, his hands clumsily trying to eradicate Tony of his shirt. Inventor helped him, elevating himself for a second and the irritating piece of clothing finally found itself on the floor. Loki’s cool hands made Tony shiver as they drew a path of possessive touches along his spine. They kissed again, heatedly and hungrily. They never acknowledged it out loud, but any night together might have been their last and the hidden desperation was fuelling their every encounter.

When they parted for a breath, Tony started a trail of kisses on Loki’s jaw, then lowered, continuing along his sternum and stomach. When he found himself at the level of hips, without any warning, he took Loki’s half hard cock into his mouth.

He licked and sucked the head, looking up with some caution at the other man, almost seeking approval. He was always on the receiving end of such an act, but he was sure he remembered a few tricks that he enjoyed himself and was capable of mimicking them. The loud groan that escaped Loki’s lips was enough of affirmation he was not doing badly. Tony clenched his hands harder on pale thighs before he took his lover deeper into his mouth, encouraged by the gasped moans of Loki. He never thought that he would feel so accomplished by having other man’s cock almost in this throat. But recently he surprised himself a lot.

When he felt Loki’s hands in his hair, clutching almost desperately, he knew scientist was close to release. He intensified the act and before he could think it through, he heard his name cried aloud and Loki’s seed filling his mouth. He swallowed it involuntarily, ignoring the taste and slowly recoiled.

Loki was panting, his eyes closed in expression of bliss, clothes still on but ragged. He looked breathtakingly beautiful. And Tony decided the man needs to know that.

He lowered himself again, this time placing his mouth next to his lover’s ear, so that his lips were dabbing it while he talked. “You’re gorgeous.”

“Don’t lie to the god of lies” he replied, but there was a smile on his lips.

“You can’t hold such a title as you can’t detect one, but I can call you a god, if you want.”

Loki giggled and once again Tony thought he would never get tired of the sound. He laughed along, but it stopped short when he felt cold fingers on his neglected erection.

“Don’t think I forgot about you.”

Loki turned them around, so the American was the one lying down. He planted passionate kiss on Tony’s lips while his hand was stroking him energetically. Tony was quickly on the verge of climax, the sensation doubled by the prior prolonging of any act towards him. He was digging his nails into Loki’s back while they shared sloppy kisses, his moans obscured by his lover’s eager lips.

The release made his mind go blank.

жжж

“I was always living in the shadow of my brother, even as a child. You always yearn for meeting your father's expectations, even if you don't admit it. I was following my brother’s steps in becoming an army man; to make father proud. But as a youngster I discovered I had a sharp mind and propensity for rather mental development. I forsook the physical trainings in favour of studying books. I haven't thought that I would be so condemned for this decision.”

They lied alongside, tangled in the sheets, their temples touching; scientist’s back on the other man’s chest. Tony had his hands around Loki’s waist, while he kept drawing meaningless patterns with his fingertips onto American’s forearm.

They were still embraced by delight and Loki’s feelings finally seemed unlocked. The words were leaving his mouth almost on their own, the relief of sharing the pain, filling him gradually with every exhalation.

“I was always treated worse and I blamed myself for that. I thought that I must be somehow damaged and tried to do everything I could to fix it. But it turns out it was unreachable notion. The fault was in my veins. I could never meet the expectations of my father because I'm not of his blood. I'm a foundling, he never came to love.”

Tony shifted him even closer to himself and left a kiss on Loki’s shoulder.

“You must never perceive yourself through the eyes of your father,” he said, his voice delicate but firm. “I tend to blather a lot, but truly, I am not skilful with words. But there are things you need to be told and I find myself under obligation to say them to you.” He left another kiss on scientist shoulder.

“You are wonderful, Loki - do you hear me? You are one of the best people I've ever met. You have glorious mind which should be a source of envy, not disdain. You evoked feelings inside of me that I thought I wasn’t capable of. You are beautiful, unique being and I refuse to live in reality where you believe otherwise.”

Loki sniggered and hid his face in pale hands. But still, Tony could spot the blush on his cheeks.

“Sometimes I think you're a trick of my mind. So flawed and so perfect - it's impossible to exist in such contradiction,” he whispered into his palms.

“Yet here I am. With you.”

жжж

Though Tony didn’t want to leave Loki’s room, he had to eventually face his friends.

When he entered the living room just before breakfast, Jane and Steven were visibly waiting for him. Their eyes sought for someone by his side, but he was alone. Loki was still no ready to face anyone but his lover.

“We were expecting you,” said the soldier.

Tony smiled crookedly but it didn’t reach his eyes. “And not only me, as I observe.”

Jane patted the place beside her on the couch. Tony obliged and sat there.

“We’re just worried about you. You’re not a person who easily gets attached to anyone and you swiftly came to care about the younger of Odinson brothers.”

Inventor clenched his jaw. He knew this conversation was coming, but it didn’t mean he was ready for it - for all those lies and equivocations.

“As you mentioned, we did find a correlation. He is a man of science like me—” started Tony and rubbed his eyes tiredly. If there was anywhere in the universe a place where the only needed explanation would be admitting love for the man. But this was _not here._ “And you are both aware of the fact that my family relations weren’t tremendous. Loki has just found out about really disturbing piece of information regarding his past. His reaction was reckless and I aided him before he involved himself into more difficulties. I know how such a betrayal undergoes and I want to grant him support I never got. The truth is I never asked for it then and he is the same kind of stubborn individual as me. I desire to help him and I will.”

God, he sounded like was drunk. He couldn’t find himself constructing any succinct utterance.

“We do not criticize you, Tony” Steven replied tamely. “We just don’t wish for you to get hurt. You seemed to befriend young Mr. Odinson and we are content for you to find a kindred spirit here, but engaging oneself into familial troubles often backfires.”

Tony took a deep, slow breath. He was bursting with emotions. He wanted to shout out loud that he ultimately found happiness and he didn’t care _at all_ which level of hell did this forbidden fruit belonged to. But the show must have been protracted.

“I am ready to take the risk,” he declared at last. Then he turned his eyes to Jane. “And I promise you, my dear cousin, that this affair will in no way disturb your relation with Officer Odinson.”

“I did not mean—“

He silenced her with a gesture of his hand. He knew his friends were concerned about him, but also he was aware of the fears that might have evoked in Jane’s heart when nuisances regarding Loki were dragged into Netherfield Park by him.

“Now, if you would excuse me, I think I will eat the breakfast in the east wing along with our guest. I hope you do not mind.”

“Well, of course not, Tony.”

“ _Thank you_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Since academic year started I'm finding myself with less and less time to write. And I have too many ongoing projects (my bad...) to update any of them regularly. Sorry :c  
>  And when it comes to this particular story, my anxiousness about the quality of my English is only growing as the studies goes, so I am rewriting it too much. Curse you, linguistics!_
> 
> _And as always, THANK YOU ALL for your feedback. When I first came up with the crazy idea of this story I never thought it would gain that much readership. I'm not known ff-writer and I do not create any popular stories, but I never expected the kind of response as I actually got. Thanks again._


	9. Subsequents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I still haven’t decided what I’ll do after wedding, but I— I’m sure of one thing. This, we, whatever we are, needs to end.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Not beta'd. I'm sorry you had to wait so long for the last chapter. And that it isn't as good as it should be._   
>  _I just hope some of you will enjoy it anyway._
> 
> _THANK YOU ALL for reading this story and the feedback you left. It was an amazing adventure to share with all of you lovable people!_ _(Additionally, I'm awfully ill at the moment, so I'm sorry for getting sentimental and stuff.)_

The next day passed in a relative tranquillity. Loki joined everyone for dinner and they managed not to awake nervous atmosphere. Loki was charming, almost out of character, but Steven and Jane came to enjoy their guest’s presence. It all seemed to turn out quite well.

Tony was waiting for something to break the smooth turn of events.

The inventor and the scientist spent yet another night together, cherishing every touch. In those moments they almost felt like they entered another world in which they were actually able to engage into relationship and simply savour it, without worries of rules, decorum and society's expectations.

ж ж ж

It was the following noon that reminded them of reality in a harsh way - as it had a custom to – when Thor came to visit. Loki refused to take part in the meeting, but it was Jane that the older Odinson asked for a private seeing with. Everyone had seen what was coming for a long time so there were no awes or surprises.

Tony entered east wing with tenuousness. Loki was in the dining room turned Tony’s workshop, sitting on the window seat and reading one of the books he took from the American’s study.

“He left so quickly?” the raven-haired man asked, furrowing his brows.

“No. I’m afraid Jane is accepting his proposal at the moment.”

Loki’s face became a shade paler and then he gasped as the sudden realisation struck him.

“ _This is it_. It must have been father’s doing— He hurried Thor to marry so _I_ would be fully excluded from the family.”

Tony felt cold sweat spreading on his neck. He hadn’t thought of that. Thor’s marriage wholly denied Loki’s rights to Odinson’s assets.

“That is neatly cruel revenge for my tantrum, I must admit.” Loki’s voice was broken. He still held hope this whole madness will somehow be solved. But now every bit of hope left him. He was trembling when Tony took him into his arms. “It’s over. There’s no turning tables. I’m to accept being dispossessed and unwanted.”

Tony kissed his temple, then his brow, the pale cheek. “You’re never unwanted.”

“My family rejects me. Why would you insist on being involved with me?”

“You’re a fool, Loki. But I love you still, my fool.”

The scientist tensed when the last sentence hung in the air.

“Tony, _what_ have you just said?”

Before the inventor had a chance to reply, knocking reverberated in the room, shovelling them back to reality of the moment. Tony planted last tender kiss on Loki’s lips and went to answer the door.

“Steven?”

“I think you should join us. Both of you, to be frank. Miss Foster and Mr. Odinson have just announced their engagement.”

Tony looked behind his shoulder at his lover. He was clenching his fists, at the verge of losing composure.

“I don’t think Mr. Odinson is ready to face his older brother. I’ll go and congratulate the pair on behalf of us both.”

ж ж ж

When all of the compulsory amenities were fulfilled and Jane engaged herself with giggling at Steven’s teasing how they all did see this coming, Thor took Tony to the side.

“Why Loki didn’t join us?”

Tony’s grip on his glass of celebratory wine tightened. “Did your father reveal you the reason for Loki’s sudden desire to leave?”

“Yes, he did,” Thor’s ineffaceable beaming expression turned into one of sorrow. “But Loki is still my brother, even if we do not share the same blood. I want him to be by my side and share my happiness.”

“Have you forgotten that your marriage will ultimately deprive Loki of his rights to family assets?”

The officer fixed his eyes on some spot on the floor. After prolonging moment of contemplation, he finally spoke again. “Can I speak with him? I beg you, Mr. Stark. You seem to have good influence on him. Convince Loki to have a brief conversation with me.”

Tony sighed. Thor was good and honest man, who genuinely cared for Loki, despite the lack of mutual ancestors. This was what the young scientist needed – to know he was still loved by his kin.

“Come with me.”

ж ж ж

Loki was still in the place by the window, browsing through Tony’s sketches of non-existing contraption, when the inventor entered.

“Your brother wants to speak with you.”

Loki shook his head with a betrayed look in his eyes. “You know very well that I do not wish to see him.”

Tony approached him slowly. “Loki, please. To my mind, you really should give him a chance.” He took the other man’s pale hand into his own and looked into those green irises full of doubt. “Trust me.”

Raven-haired mad sighed and squeezed his lover’s hand. “Alright. But I demand your presence.”

Tony let older Mr. Odinson in. The officer suddenly seemed smaller, anxious.

“Hello, brother.”

“You are fully aware that this title does not apply to me, Thor.”

“I do not care about your origin,” retorted the other brother. “We grew up together and you are dear to my heart, no matter of blood.”

“Father never regarded me as your equal. You should also adapt this thought.”

It hurt Tony to see Loki like this. He desired what Thor offered, but he was too deeply broken and too proud to merely accept it. Fortunately, the officer didn’t simply surrender.

“You will always be my beloved brother and that is why I wish you would be present during my engagement ball and my wedding. I would not be able to fully cherish it if I don’t get your approval. I need you by my side – like you always were.”

Loki kept his gaze fixed on the window, but it was visible he was giving up. It was when Thor decided for his last resort.

“I’ve already told you _I would_ share the family assets if you would be of need.”

The younger man rapidly looked up. “You would never defy father.”

“When he is clearly wrong, _I will_.”

Loki started pacing around the room and kept Tony and Thor on the edge for a few minutes, the atmosphere in the room getting more and more tense with every passing second. They both held their breath when Loki rapidly ceased to move.

“I will attend your engagement ball and your wedding. But I will _not_ _come back_ home.” He exhaled heavily. “Until your wedding, I’ll be staying here, in Netherfield Park. After that, I’m leaving. I will take what I do deserve and _leave_.”

Thor opened his mouth to protest but swiftly decided against it. He looked hurt but he knew he would not bargain more. “If that is your will,” he nodded. “Thank you, brother.”

The officer nodded again as a goodbye to Tony and left. The inventor approached Loki cautiously.

“So you’ve made _some_ decision. But what will you do after the wedding?”

“I don’t know!” he snapped and regretted it the next second, covering his face with his hands. “I do not know,” he added, much weaker.

ж ж ж

The engagement ball was organised surprisingly swiftly. The date was announced the same day that assenting letter was received from Mrs Pemberton - Jane’s wielder of dower. Loki commented on it with sarcasm, accounting that his father wanted to quicken excluding him as much as he was able to. After the conversation with Thor, he stopped diving into sorrow and instead, he took up sardonic attitude towards any issue concerning his family. Tony couldn’t decide which manner was more disturbing.

During the period between the engagement and the wedding itself, after which Loki was supposed to abscond, Tony and Loki were both trying to close themselves from the outside world. The young scientist didn’t form any decision about his future yet and Tony did not bring the topic.

They hardly left the east wing of Netherfield Park, usually working side by side on some of inventor’s projects or simply just observing as the other studied books or made notes. When they did leave, it was for long walks in their exclusive company, never inviting anyone to join the bizarre pair of men of science. They ate all the meals along with Jane and Steven, sometimes also with Thor when he came to visit his fiancée, but that were the only occasions that other residents actually saw them. No one knew that Loki feigned living in the guest room for servant’s eyes and actually dwelled in Tony’s bedroom, both of them treating every night as their last, though none of them ever spoke of it. They knew they were careless. But so was their whole affair.

The day of the engagement ball, they were both quiet. After the breakfast they went to the garden, each with book in hand and spent the noon reading, seated on the ground under the large tree and leaning on the bough, their knees touching continuously.

ж ж ж

Loki was immensely tense when they were entering Odinson’s mansion. Tony wanted to grab his hand, give him reassurance that he was still by his side, but he could only bit his lip in frustration and play along.

They arrived with Steven and the betrothed pair approached the three of them right away. Thor and Jane were beaming and Tony felt the mixture of emotions boiling inside of him. He was overly happy for his cousin - she was almost like a younger sister to him and he always wanted the best for her. But the same time jealously and sense of injustice found their way to wrap around his heart. Why couldn’t he have what they had? What was _lesser_ in his feelings towards Loki?

Tony hugged Jane, then turned to Thor and murmured “I hope you appreciate how lucky you are,” as he shook officer’s hand. He noticed how his cousin was watching him intently, but she had no chance of enquiring him as next guests were demanding attention of the pair.

As Tony and Loki made their way to more secluded corner of the room, trying to attract as little attention to themselves as possible, they were soon accompanied by someone else of Odinson’s family.

“Loki, you’re here!” Mrs Odinson embraced Loki tightly, one of her hands instantly finding it’s way to young scientist’s hair, stroking them tenderly. Tony saw how his lover tensed the first moment, but quickly surrendered to the caress. “Oh, _my son_. Why hadn’t you spoken to me before you fled?” Mrs Odinson leaned back a little and took Loki’s pale face into her hands.

“I— I’m sorry,” he stuttered anxiously.

“You know you _are_ my son, don’t you? I love you and nothing else matters.”

Loki took a shuddering breath and nodded, a shadow of a smile dancing on his lips.

“You were always a free soul, suffocating in the walls of this house, I know. And I won’t keep you here, even though I would desire so. But don’t you dare leave without saying goodbye, my little trickster.”

She planted a kiss on his forehead and came back to attend the gathering guests.

Tony took a step closer towards his lover. “Loki?”

“I need some air,” he responded and finally raised his head to look at the American. “I’ll be back in a minute.” He smiled at the plain worry in brown eyes, gently and genuinely. “I’m alright, don’t worry. _I’m really alright_.”

When Loki slipped out of the room, Tony didn’t have much time to actually analyze the scene he had just witnessed. Steven and Jane approached him eagerly, with a stranger by their side.

“Cousin, there’s someone I’d like you to meet,” the bride-to-be announced, pointing at the woman next to her. “This is Miss Jean Grey.”

Tony stepped towards the lady in question, then took her hand into his and kissed her knuckles in an act of greeting. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Miss Grey. I’m Tony Stark.”

“Good evening, Mr Stark,” she replied, smiling. She was a truly beautiful woman, Tony couldn’t deny her that, of natural grace and appealing aura. Her red hair seemed to be flaming in the glow of candles and her eyes were of sublimely contrasting shade of green.

But not as enchanting as the green of Loki’s irises...

“Miss Grey arrived in the neighbourhood a few days ago and doesn’t know many people yet,” said Steven.

“Well, I’m sure someone as charming will not have any problems in befriending anyone in our neighbourhood,” responded the inventor.

Jane was conspicuously pleased with his answer. “Then I’m sure you will be delighted to promise our new friend next dance, won’t you, cousin?”

Then it clicked and Tony almost laughed. He wasn’t called a genius without reasons.

His muddle-headed with love cousin and avuncular friend were trying to play a game of making a match - with beautiful Jean Grey and Tony himself as their pawns.

Jane and Steven were looking at him with such expectation that he couldn’t say no.

“Well, how could I refuse,” he said at last and then turned to the red-haired woman. “Would you honour me with next dance, Miss Grey?”

“How could I refuse,” she replied and Tony couldn’t suppress a grin. She was also witty.

She could indeed be a great match for him. If only he wasn’t in love with a broken man with green eyes so much more captivating than hers.

But then the prevailing song ended, the preparation for next dance begun and Tony had to fulfil his promise.

He took Jean’s hand into his and guided her to the dance floor. He didn’t dance often, but it was one of those things he was simply good at and quite enjoyed if he actually decided to do it. Jean’s movements were graceful and refined, her lips arched in intriguing smile which Tony couldn’t not reciprocate. If only...

He caught Steven’s smug gaze in the crowd, Jane’s beaming face next to him and then right behind her... Loki. When their looks crossed, he turned abruptly and went out of the building. Tony’s heart twisted at the sight of his sad eyes and suddenly all the joy from the dance evaporated. Unsettled, he finished the dance, though his eyes had not met the gaze of his partner not even once. When the music stopped, he thanked Jean hastily and almost run out to the gardens.

Loki had some advantage over him, but the American still could make out his silhouette in the half-light and follow the younger man. Halfway, the inventor realised they’re heading to their lake. Well, it would be a good place to do this, he decided suddenly. The best one.

When Tony finally approached him, Loki was leaning on his favourite tree, gazing into the dark depths of the water. Moon was shining brightly that night and it’s radiance played sublimely over scientist’s features.

“Why did you follow me?”

“Why did you run away?”

Loki bit hard into his lower lip and Tony had a sudden urge to lick the sore place and embrace the other man. But he knew that Loki would not appreciate it now. He was in the middle of some inner fight and it seemed like this time it included the inventor.

“I still haven’t decided what I’ll do after wedding, but I— I’m sure of one thing. _This_ , we, whatever we are, needs to end.”

Tony took a deep shuddering breath. “You don’t mean it, Loki--“

“I always mean my words,” he interrupted before the American managed to say anything more. “We need to stop fooling ourselves. We never had any future, but— But you can still get married and be happy. And we both know that eventually you will. You can have anyone you want.”

“And I want you.”

“ _No!_ Stop!” Loki started pacing, but still kept his distance from the other man. “I’ve seen you with that woman there. Everyone saw you. This is who you should be, not a bachelor with clandestine lover. Everyone saw that. You see that too.”

Tony laughed nervously. “There are things I may be wrong about, but I _do_ know what and _who_ I desire.”

"We are bringing a life sentence upon ourselves because of lust," Loki stopped walking in circles and hid his face in his hands.

"Is it only lust to you?" the inventor riposted, angry at himself how weak the question sounded.

"Is it _anything more_ than lust to you?"

Tony could not endure any more second of this conversation. He closed the distance between them and before Loki could react, he was being kissed passionately, his shoulders clenched almost painfully.

“You fool. I love you, don’t you understand?” Tony said at last. “I hope you do, because I’m really not good at confessions like that.”

Loki was gazing at him for what seemed like hours, with his mouth slightly parted, ready to speak, but no words came. Finally, he nuzzled into the other man’s neck and breathed deeply.

“How do you imagine all this?” he queried, his voice almost inaudible. “I can’t be your ‘kept woman’.”

Tony chuckled. “No, you won’t be my ‘kept woman’. And neither a ‘kept man’, before you ask... But, I want you to come with me to America.”

“W-what? But what will I do there--?”

Tony took a step back and started to browse through his pockets. “I’ve been carrying it with me for days but... I wasn’t sure how to tell you.”

He took out some creased document and handed it to perplexed Loki. “It’s scholarship for talented young scientists,” he started explaining before Loki could read it for himself. “I started working on it after our first meeting. Quite a troublesome thing to establish, but the outcome is the most important. Every year, if the income is sufficient, my company will provide scholarship and facilitate the use of our laboratories for two lucky geniuses. This year, the first one is a fellow called Bruce Banner. I met him couple of months ago in New York. Amazing mind and innovative ideas. The other receiver is you. If you accept.”

Tony almost lost his balance when Loki jumped at him and hugged him tightly.

“How can I respond in kind to such an act?” he murmured, burying his face in the inventor’s hair.

“Just come with me. Don’t leave me.”

“There’s nothing I wish more. I love you, too.”

Tony grinned. Maybe it would all turn sour before they even manage to notice; maybe they’d actually find a place where they could be together. There were no certainties. But he knew they both deserved this smidgen of happiness. And they’d savour this comfortable numbness as long as they’d be allowed to.

Now, as they found each other, everything seemed brighter.

 

жжж тне епd жжж

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PS: I'm on [tumblr](http://missmho.tumblr.com/) and [twitter](https://twitter.com/hoodedmiho) if anyone wants to fangirl over RDJ's beard. ;>


End file.
